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  • You're not too old, and it's never too late

Thursday, September 1, 2016

Don't Blink

I blinked, and it flew by, just like I knew it would. 

I’m speaking about the month of August, the whole summer, the past 18 years, actually.

We dropped our oldest daughter off at college two weeks ago. I can’t believe she’s no longer in the house. I can’t believe I survived letting her go. 

It helps that she’s been good at keeping in touch via texting and phone calls. We even Face Timed once. What a thrill that was! I keep telling people I feel like a teenage girl with her first boyfriend. I drop everything when my daughter texts or calls. Sauces can curdle on the stove, my hair can be thrown up in a clip instead of straightened with a flat iron when the phone rings and I see it’s my daughter on the other end. Life be damned!

This summer was consumed by my eldest. The world revolved around her more so than usual. There were AP and IB exams the whole month of May, Prom, Graduation, a bazillion grad parties, her own grad party, dorm shopping, the “goodbye tour” where she bid adieu to friends and family and ultimately our own goodbyes. Now life has slowed to a dull roar. My youngest is home, playing field hockey, getting ready for her sophomore year in high school. The house is less frenetic, there aren’t as many kids hanging around. It’s quieter. 

It’s also cleaner. I’ve found a renewed interest in vacuuming and dusting, activities that had fallen by the wayside these past few months. There aren’t any dishes clogging up the sink, and my counters are bare, wiped and polished. It’s whatever is the opposite of nesting…cleaning and straightening up because a chick has flown the coop rather than come home to it. 

I guess it’s just a way to keep busy, to keep my mind from going where it shouldn’t—to the dark, netherworld that reminds me my daughter is off on her own (sort of) enjoying a life I’m really not a part of. If I let myself, I can feel pretty lonely and left out, like the younger girlfriend whose older boyfriend goes away to school. Parental FOMO. That’s what I have at the moment. 

On the writing front, though, I have two more submissions out for consideration, which is good. I’m sticking to my 2016 goal of submitting something every month. Between the big college move and my “real” writing, the blog has suffered. I’m going to try and pay more attention to my blog and the occasional visitors who stop by. I’m guessing with one less child in the house, and no more tennis matches to attend, I’ll have more free time on my hands. I just don’t want to blink…I don’t want these next three years to zoom by because before I know it, I’ll be taking our youngest daughter to college and then it’ll be just me and the dogs. And my husband, of course. ;o)

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